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BIG HAIRY NEWS EXCLUSIVE - In order to truly understand what the "Occupy Wall Street" protesters are experiencing, I have gone undercover and joined them at their Zuccotti Park camp in Manhattan this week.
As a well known public figure, I disguised my physical appearance and clothing to blend in with the protesters.
Day 1 - Sunday October 23, 2011.
8:22 AM - Arrived at Zuccotti Park. I paid several new friends $20 each to erect the tent that will be my home for the next week. I had to move some apparently abandoned tents that were in the way. Smoked some good bud with my new friend Lisa.
9:12 AM - I apologized and paid for some tents that I accidentally threw away because I thought they were abandoned. Smoked some good bud with the former tent owners.
10:56 AM - Lisa and I went shopping for some furniture.
1:32 PM - After a lunch at Applebees, Lisa and I joined our fellow protesters in making some new protest signs and talking about how much we hate rich people. Some hippy guy noticed my Diamond Rolex, but I cleverly explained that it was a gift from PETA for saving some baby seals. Smoked some good bud with him.
1:38 PM - I took a nap with new friend Jennifer. She's from New Jersey but doesn't know Snooki.
8:35 PM - After taking some of my new friends to Olive Garden, we came back to camp where they invited me to join their drum circle. I rented some bongos from a nice guy named Oscar, and made a note to buy my own drums tomorrow. Smoked some good hashish and drank wine.
10:23 PM - Got a ticket for urinating on the side of a city bus.
10:48 PM - Went to bed at new friend Andrea's tent since my bed hasn't been delivered yet. Made note to get STD checkup next week. End of day one.
My new friends hang out in front of my tent in Zuccotti Park
