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WASHINGTON (WNB) - President Barack Hussein Obama issued the following politically correct statement celebrating the Muslim holiday "Eid-al-Fitr" on Monday.
This last month has been a time of fasting, reflection, spiritual renewal, and service to the less fortunate. While Eid marks the completion of Ramadan, it also celebrates the common values that unite us in our humanity.
In the United States, Eid also reminds us of the many achievements and contributions of Muslim Americans to building the very fabric of our nation and strengthening the core of our democracy.
Translated for accuracy:
For Muslims this last month has been a time of wife beating, carpet kissing, and of course, sodomizing nephews. While Eid marks the completion of Ramadamadingdong, it also celebrates values that separate them from civilized humanity - beheading infidels, Killing Jews, beating and mutilating women, and obviously, blowing themselves up.
In the United States, Eid also reminds us of the single achievement Muslim Americans have contributed to our nation - piloting taxicabs smelling like ass.
