WORLD NEWS BUREAU - Today's top stories
Mexico Threatens US With Repercussions
NACHOS BELL GRANDE, Mexico - The Mexican government is warning they will punish the United States if Donald Trump is elected president and follows through on his threat to tax the estimated $20 billion that Mexicans working/drawing welfare in the U.S. send home each year.
Trump responded to the threat by asking, "What are they going to do, tell the illegals here to short-sheet our beds and misshape our hedges? Please."
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Pro-Hillary PAC Paying $1 Million To Online Trolls
NEW YORK - I'm fairly certain this story is untrue, as Mrs. Clinton's decades-long record of succuss in moving our country forward speaks for itself with no need for outside help. This strong, principled female has tirelessly worked to advance middle-class families, women, minorities, and LGBT individuals in our society, while making America the safest it has ever been thanks to her efforts as one of the most successful Secretaries of State in history.
Unlike her challengers, Hillary truly cares for all people and will represent everyone fairly as the first woman president of the United States. Please join me in supporting Hillary Clinton for president - our country needs a woman's touch.
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Wendy's Rolls Out Self-Serve Kiosks
UNIONTOWN, Ohio - Wendy's fast food restaurant chain has announced they are installing self-serve kiosks in over 16,000 locations.
Outrage from fast food workers and organizations promoting a $15 an hour minimum wage was immediate but quickly dissipated when Wendy's announced they will be paying the robots $19.50 an hour each, plus full medical benefits.
Hillary Clinton: Female. Strong. Principled.